The Bully Factor

Bullying is extremely destructive, so much so, that, in extreme cases, youngsters have committed suicide.  They get bullied in the school yard and on social media—on their cell phones, on Twitter, Instagram, etc.  It can be overwhelming and devastating.  Singled out, they feel alone, small, and hated so they end themselves.  We are horrified and call it horrible, judgmental, and unloving.

We say there is no room for bullying.  That it is unacceptable; yet, every day we persist in bully behavior!  How? We bully ourselves with negative self-talk, such as, I am not good enough.  I am stupid. I am ugly.  I am a failure.  I am sure you can think of a few good examples, because we all do it at one time or another.

If we consider school-yard bullying unacceptable, why be one to ourselves?  Isn’t it about time to let go of this self-sabotaging thinking? It keeps us from achieving our dreams.

It feeds on our fears.  Two biggies are fear of failure and fear of success, although there are many others. Let’s look at those two here.

If you feared failure?  What is the worst thing that could happen if you failed?  Many highly successful people have claimed they would not have been nearly as successful if they hadn’t failed along the way because they learned what didn’t work.

If you discovered you feared success, what does success mean to you? What would change if you were successful?

Positive self-talk can replace negative, bully talk through actively replacing pessimistic thoughts.  When you say I can’t, replace with how can I do it, until you say automatically, “I can!”

Successful people do not give up hope, they banish bully talk and practice positive self-talk, and they don’t give up.

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